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another word for orgasm


a medical condition where a male has too many erections that are often painful and embarrassing




a marriage in which brothers share their wives amongst each other


a span of time after an intense BDSM session during which the submissive partner is tended to by his/her Dominant; can include resting, rehydration/feeding, cleaning wounds, putting salve on chafes (from handcuffs/bondage), drawing a bath, psychological repair, or perhaps, just providing a safe quiet space for the submissive to collect his/her thoughts

age of majority

the age when one is legally considered an adult by the governing laws of their current location and/or residence

age play

any roleplay/fantasy that involves a change in age; the most common is one or more adults pretending to be a teenager or child but can also include aging fantasies.

algolagnia, algophilia

psychological and sexual arousal from the infliction of pain

alternative lifestyle

a general term that refers to sexual preferences and practices outside the accepted societal norm of monogamous, heterosexual partnerships


a term for female ejaculation that has its roots in tantric sex practices

androgyny, androgynous

a representation (usually through dress, speech, and demeanor) that is a balanced mix of both female and male identity


a male who has no testicles, either from birth or as the result of castration




any food, drink, drug, or other stimulus taken internally that causes sexual arousal

autoerotic asphyxia

self-strangulation or suffocation to bring on sexual excitement


another term for masturbation


the ability to perform (and the act of performing) oral sex on one’s own penis


acronym for bondage and discipline


broad term for sexual predilections involving power exchange, sadomasochism, and/or bondage. The letters in this acronym can be constructed using the subsets of this catch all:
B&D = bondage & discipline
D/s = Domination & submission
S&M = sadism & masochism

practitioners of BDSM have many different triggers including humiliation, physical pain, endurance, and restraint

behavioral transexual

passing through lifestyle, dress, and demeanor as a member of the opposite gender without having sexual reassignment or gender modification surgery

body modification

piercing, branding, tattoos, body corsets, and other means of modifying the body


the person in a BDSM relationship who is the recipient of the bondage, discipline, and sadism; a bottom is not necessarily submissive


oral sex performed on a vagina

edge play

any sexual play that carries serious risk of physical harm including breath control/asphyxiation, electrical play, bloodsports, and fire play; can also be applied to play that breaks a person’s previous boundaries

fan fiction

the precursor to Slash fiction, fan fiction has roots in the cancellation of Star Trek, which caused fans to start writing their own fiction featuring those characters. Fan Fiction is anything with well known media characters, there are websites for both G rated and “adult” fan fiction.


“fetish” can actually be applied to any affection for or fixation on a specific act, object, idea, or person; it needn’t be a sexual connotation; sexual fetishes are actions, objects, persons, or ideas that serve as triggers for sexual arousal


a form of sexual desire in which gratification is linked to a specific object, article of clothing or body part


broad term for any type of whipping, spanking, caning, flogging, etc

gonzo porn

porn film that has no plotline but rather just shows one sex act after another


to impregnate a woman; often used in fetish circles among men who fantasize about serially impregnanting women or one specific woman

hard swap

allowing your partner to fuck someone else when you aren’t present


exceptionally hairy – used to describe either male or female, although I see it more often used to describe women who don’t shave, and have the normal amount of hair any woman would who didn’t shave.


the desire to have sex with someone of the same sex

Kink, kinky

a Kink is a person who practices sexual activities outside mainstream intercourse and play; kinky is used to describe any sexual activity that goes beyond the mainstream


having no reserved predilections or sexual limits


the boundaries a person places on their sexual desires and willingness to engage in activities; in BDSM scenes, all persons’ “limits” should be discussed prior to beginning play, even those of the submissive


either stroking a man’s cock and bringing him to orgasm and then continuing to stroke him hard (and to orgasm) again and again..
Using dildos, electronic stimuli, or fingering of the prostate to cause ejaculation without stroking the penis or allowing orgasm

nitrite inhalants

recreational drug used as an aphrodisiac or sexual stimulant by inhaling vabors released from capsules snapped open; also called “poppers” or “snappers”


a person who is attracted to all genders and all forms of sex


any sexual intercourse that involves the penis (anal, oral, or vaginal)


chemicals created by the body that are released by animals (including humans) to cause physical attraction


the act of being in a loving, intimate relationship with more than one person


being married to more than one person at a time; most polygamists are men and must operate outside the law, concealing their practice


a liquid aphrodisiac/stimulant that is inhaled; the term “poppers” comes from the fact that it often comes in capsules that are “popped” open to release the stimulant

Power Exchange, Total Power Exchange

describes the relationship between a Dominant and submissive; “Total Power Exchange” is used to describe long term relationships that retain the frames of D/s


any physical means used to prevent pregnancy, most often used in reference to a condom

PVC (polyvinylchloride)

plastic material used in fetish wear

Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK)

one school of thought in the BDSM community to define the parameters of play; RACK acknowledges that most BDSM activities have risks for those participating but as long as everyone is fully aware of those risks and still enters the play, then the activity is ethically acceptable

sadism, sadist

sexual arousal from infliction pain or humilation on another person

safe sex

sexual intercourse that involves the use of some type of protection against disease and pregnancy, most often through the use of condoms or dental dams

safe word

word decided upon before play that the bottom can use at any time during a BDSM session to stop the action (Can also be a non-verbal signal for gagged play)


bottom/submissive; person who gives control over to a specific Dominant


anal intercourse; often used in a derogatory manner


name for a person who can take on both dominant and submissive roles, depending on their mood, the kink, and/or their partner

vanilla sex

sexual activities that do not include kink, bdsm, or fetishism


acronym for “Your Kink Is OK”; used as a symbol of inclusiveness with clubs, organizations, websites, and on personal ads