Comments on: bondage lessons and meeting your OTKL (one true kinky love)

By: Dale

Dale — Thu, 16 Mar 2006 16:55:50 +0000

Just want to comment on the Poly/Mono thing a bit.

I am most definitely a born-Poly, but I do not believe in a group (tribal?) mindset about my Polyamory. I am also partnered with a Mono guy who rocks my world.

It is very difficult to find writing about kink in relationships such as yours and Elliott’s. I wonder if that is because charing kink in such an intense and private relationship is a contradiction to the whole process – in that the kink works and it works as well as it does in part because you trust the other person and it is so extremely private.

My mono partner believes he is kinkier than I – and I’ll concede that point. I would like a very limited field of other partners – that is my personal kink. I don’t want to swing. I don’t want to advertise. It is very difficult.

I hope you’ll keep writing, as best as you are able, about your kink with Elliott because I believe it is important to the non-group community of both kinksters and poly folk like myself and my partner.

By: Jane

Jane — Thu, 16 Mar 2006 05:54:22 +0000

ack. I’d better go find my login info then, huh?

and hey, I’m never naughty. Just ask Elliott. ;-)

By: Pluto

Pluto — Thu, 16 Mar 2006 00:38:51 +0000

Jane,

Your Yahoo group is still there, but *someone* set it up so only she can post messages and links…

That was very naughty! ;-)

Pluto

By: Jane

Jane — Thu, 16 Mar 2006 00:12:51 +0000

hi Pluto.. sure, it’s fine by me, thank you!

hey Dave – totally looking forward to the Alaska trip. I looked into the ferry option a few years ago, and it was too expensive for me to do at the time. I absolutely can’t wait, I’ve heard for years how gorgeous the inside passage is. I’ll be sure to take lots of pictures.. :)

By: Dave

Dave — Wed, 15 Mar 2006 21:07:54 +0000

Hi Jane,

I bet you have a great time on your Alaska trip. I’ve made the trip twice by ferry and loved it and will do it again. Great relaxing trip. And your other trip will be good as well, keep us posted.

By: Pluto

Pluto — Wed, 15 Mar 2006 20:51:41 +0000

Ok, if it’s alright with you, I’ll post s link in the old group there.

Pluto

By: Jane

Jane — Wed, 15 Mar 2006 01:04:08 +0000

heh. I have been moving all over the place, I just can’t seem to make up my mind anymore where I wanna be, can I?

I don’t remember by Yahoo login… it’s actually been that long, how weird…

By: Pluto

Pluto — Tue, 14 Mar 2006 16:49:55 +0000

Jane, you’ve changed where you’ve posted a few times. You might want to drop a post at the old Yahoo groups, or I’d be happy to do it for you if you don’t belong there any longer.

Pluto

By: Pluto

Pluto — Tue, 14 Mar 2006 16:43:30 +0000

Lol, you’re down to me…a bad sign indeed! ;-)

I don’t bother to label myself, or others. We are each individuals. We do have common threads by which we do identify ourslves, I suppose, to draw support as “Family”. Just as the habits we have as children change as we become teenagers, and then on to adults, I believe we continue to evolve.

I think the trouble comes when the label becomes more important than the person…

Pluto

By: Jane

Jane — Tue, 14 Mar 2006 06:08:18 +0000

damn, Pluto – without you the comments field would be dead anymore.

re: labels, they’re necessary sometimes I suppose. I guess I end up having a harder and harder time with them when my own seem to be so shapeshifting. I don’t ever mean to mislead, but how do you label when your own truth is always evolving?